Oh, hibernation awaits! I love having that extra hour when the time changes, as it did this weekend, but it does jangle the chimes of my body clock. Not as jarring as the jangle in the spring when we LOSE an hour, but still. I feel tired earlier and I just want to sleep at random times during the day. It usually works itself out, but the older I am, the longer that takes.
This weekend was my husband's drill weekend. With my oldest daugher visiting her dad, I was missing another pseudo-adult in the house. M2 did her best to step up to the plate, but she's 8. And a redhead. She vacillates between cleaning the bathroom, loading the dishwasher and vacuuming the carpet to riding her bike for hours, to helping me separate out a huge Scentsy party order, to whining and throwing a fit in the middle of the living room floor. It's always an interesting ride. And, with the youngest, it is what it is. I did really well this weekend remaining completely and totally unfazed by her antics, so I'm pleased with that.
The week ahead is not one that I can hibernate through, however. Lots of stuff scheduled at work, plus M1 and M2 have early dismissal two days this week, I have to attend two parent-teacher conferences & we have family photos scheduled for Friday. Let the kvetching begin. It is very odd to have photos scheduled with the original four of us when the fifth is still here, but I have a 16x20 gallery wrapped canvas portrait credit that I must spend by 12/12 or lose it. I want a photo for over the couch.
I bought this credit fully intending for that to be a huge family photo of five. Not to be. I'm sure we'll hear all about how uncouth it is, but I can't help reality.With our family being a military family, I insist on family photos at least once a year. Usually, they come in the fall/early winter around the time I'm looking for Christmas card ideas. I'm not going to not do our traditional things because we have not regained control of our daily life yet. That wouldn't be fair to M1 and 2 and, frankly, they have been through enough already. We have been judged regularly and harshly for most of the past two years.
We were a family before this child came. We are a family now. We will remain one after she is gone. Period. The insular group we have become is much smaller than it once was, but no one is complaining. We are not going to skip documenting our family, but I'm sure if these somehow show up somewhere public, my ears will be burning and my nose will be itching.
I know that. And I don't care anymore. I have never felt more relaxed, more free and more normal than I have the day I released the white-knuckled grip I had on wanting to be heard and understood. I realized that had not happened prior to this--this was nothing new. And, that realization and speaking that truth probably saved what I hope with be the second half of my life.
It took me nearly 40 years, but I now have perspective and I'm so thankful for that.
Speaking of thankful--it's time for Sunday's 5!
1) I am thankful for the perspective I mentioned above & the excitement it has brought to looking forward to the new year.
2) I am thankful for the sunny weekend we had. It made me feel warm and sunny even if I was the lone ranger here this weekend.
3) I am thankful for Pandora streaming audio. I have been playing the Christmas station any time I feel myself lagging. It isn't too early for me to be listening to it. It makes me feel peaceful and helps me work right through my projects.
4) I am thankful for my husband's uncanny ability to send me a text message when I need it and say exactly what I needed him to say without even realizing I needed it until I see it in print.
5) I am thankful that I was able to power through my entire to-do list today so I didn't have to feel guilty about taking it kind of easy yesterday.
It's time for a new week. Ready? Set? Get after it!